letter to Chloe
by kiitykat214
Summary: Alek writes a letter to Chloe after the season finale ... songfic to thunder by boyslike girls


_Today is a winding road that's taking me to places that I didn't want to go  
>Whoa (whoa, whoa, whoa)<br>Today in the blink of an eye I'm holding on to something and I do not know why  
>I tried<br>_

You're beautiful, you're gorgeous, you're perfect, you're everything I had always wanted, you were the one that I was in love with. But you weren't mine. You made that perfectly clear with those five heart shattering words you had just spoken to your mother. "I think I love Brian." And with those words, you broke me, the infamous Alek Petrov, player extraordinar,you broke my heart, something no one had ever been able to do before, I had to many walls up to ever let that happen, but there was just something about you Chloe that made me want to let you in, and I had. And now here I am thinking about that night when I was standing in your bedroom broken hearted. They say life is a journey and that you have to find your own path, this is one road I had never planned on going down, the road to heartbreak. Yet even though I just heard you say you think you loves Brian, I can't stop myself from holding on to some small form of hope, that was another thing you did to me, you don't let me forget about you. No matter how hard I try. And honestly I don't know why I tried to forget about you, maybe if I hadn't been such a jerk to you in the beginning this whole thing could have been avoided, and instead of telling your mom that you think you love Brian, you would have just told her that you think you love me.

_I tried to read between the lines  
>I tried to look in your eyes<br>I want a simple explanation  
>For what I'm feeling inside<br>I gotta find a way out  
>Maybe there's a way out<br>_

But maybe I should stop reading between the lines and trying to over analyse this, looking in your eyes I could tell you didn't want to love him, theres just something about the way you looked at me. Your eyes were filled with regret, and guilt, and something else that I don't quite know what it was. And honestly I just want to find a way out of this mess we're in. I want to find a way out for both of us. A way neither of us have to deal with love that was doomed from the start, you're in love with a human, and I'm in love with you. Maybe theres a way out, gods I hope so.

_Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer  
>Do you know you're unlike any other?<br>You'll always be my thunder, and I said  
>Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors<br>I don't wanna ever love another  
>You'll always be my thunder<br>So bring on the rain  
>And bring on the thunder<em>

But then I think about our summer, the one right after your transformation. We used to go down to the park by your house and we would train for hours and we would flirt, and I would make snarky comments, and you would get mad and make a sarcastic comment back, and then you would whine about the training and I would let you out early, because honestly theres, nothing I wouldn't do for you, and I could never resist you pout, it was just to cute. So, we would walk, sometimes we would talk, and others we would just enjoy each others company. And then there was that time, it had been a hot and humid day, and we had gone to the park just like always, even though we knew it was probably going to start raining, we went out anyways, it was right after we had finished the training session, and today we had decided to just lay in the grass, and talk. And that was when it happened, I think you were talking about something Paul and Amy had just done, I don't know I had been paying more attention to your voice than to what you were actually saying, but the rain started pouring down on us. It was a typical San Francisco thunderstorm. You got up and pulled me up onto my feet and you started running with me and it was amazing, because you were so care free and I watched as you laughed and spun around in the rain and danced with no care in the world, as if the thunderstorm washed all of your problems away, and it was the best day I had ever had. And I remember us twirling around and dancing together in the rain until we got so dizzy that we fell down into the grass together, you were on top of me and we were both laughing at the fact that we were soaking wet lying on each other, in the middle of a park. But then I looked up and all I was able to think about was that you had the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen, they were the deepest blue I had ever seen, almost like a sapphire, but then if you looked carefully you could see the hint of green around the corner. They were beautiful just like you. And you will always be my thunder, the thing that I think of whenever it rains, you will always be in my heart Chloe. _  
><em>

_Today is a winding road  
>Tell me where to start and tell me something I don't know<br>Whoa (whoa, whoa, whoa)  
>Today I'm on my own<br>I can't move a muscle and I can't pick up the phone  
>I don't know (I don't know, I don't know, I don't know)<em>

Today, I don't know what will happen, life's a journey, and I'm on a winding road to recovery from the heartbreak that only you could cause me. And I wish there was someway you could tell me how to start, or what it's going to be like. But we both that that can't happen. Cause today I'm on my on my own. And I want to call you, I need to hear your voice, because even though I'm trying to heal, I'm not trying to forget you, that would be pointless, I could never forget you. And no matter how much I trust the people that are protecting you while I'm gone I can't trust them completely, because I can;t trust anyone but me with your protection, not really, I guess thats what happens when you love someone. But you don't love me back and that's okay Chloe, I don;t know whats going to happen in life, but I can promise you that I will always be there for you no matter what happens. _  
><em>

_And now I'm itching for the tall grass  
>And longing for the breeze<br>I need to step outside  
>Just to see if I can breathe<br>I gotta find a way out  
>Maybe theres a way out<em>

And now I'm urning for the tall dune grass, and the breeze on my skin, as we ran on the beach that late august day. And theres nothing that I want more right now to go back and to go to the beach with you and forget about everything thats ever happened between us, but I know that's not the best idea. But right now I have to step outside just to see if I can still breathe, because being couped up here, without you makes me feel like I''m suffocating, it's funny almost, the fact that I've become so dependent on you in such a short period of time, especially considering I haven't really depended on anyone in years, but now I can barely breath without you, but I have to learn and thats why I left, because I need to find a way out of this, maybe theres a way out, and thats what I plan on finding. _  
><em>

_Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer  
>Do you know you're unlike any other?<br>You'll always be my thunder, and I said  
>Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors<br>I don't wanna ever love another  
>You'll always be my thunder<br>So bring on the rain_

Your voice was the only thing that I listened to that summer, after hearing you sing while protecting you from your room I never was able to listen to female singers again, they all seemed to pale in comparison to your voice, but you would never even think of becoming a singer after I told you that you should consider it. Because that was Amy's dream, and you being you, would never get in the way of your friends goal, you would never steal there dream willingly, because thats just not the kind of person you are. Do you know that you are unlike any other Chloe King? You are one of a kind, the brightest of them all, and I don't want to ever love someone else, because I know that they will never be better than you, and I will never be able to get over you. You will always be my thunder Chloe King.

__

_Yeah I'm walking on a tightrope  
>I'm wrapped up in vines<br>I think we'll make it out  
>But you just gotta give me time<br>Strike me down with lightning  
>Let me feel you in my veins<br>I wanna let you know how much I feel your pain_

I know that you don't love me Chloe, and sometimes I can accept that and I can handle it, but keeping my emotions in check is like walking on a tightrope while walked up, even with our mai refluxes its nearly impossible and sometimes you can't help but to fall, and unfortunately while I'm here, I know your not here to catch me, and that hurts to. But I think we'll make it out of this mess, I think I can make it through this and be the person you need me to be, because even though you don't love me I love you and I need to be able to handle handle that before I can come back. But I will be back I can promise you that, you just need to give me some time, so I can learn how to handle these things that I'm feeling inside. And I can feel your pain, Chloe I know you miss me, and that even if you do love him you care about me, and that this isn't easy for you, I feel your pain Chloe, I miss you too, more than you can ever know, but I need to do this, for me, for you, for both of us. It really is the only way.

__

_Today is a winding road that's taking me to places that I didn't want to go  
>Whoa<br>_

And as much as I don't want to do this Chloe, this is the road to recovery, and being here right now really is the only way for me to be able to deal with this. I didn't want to go here Chloe but I had to, and in the end it will all be for the better, I promise.

_Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer  
>Do you know you're unlike any other?<br>You'll always be my thunder, and I said  
>Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors<br>I don't wanna ever love another  
>You'll always be my thunder<br>So bring on the rain  
>And bring on the thunder, and I said<br>Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer  
>Do you know you're unlike any other?<br>You'll always be my thunder  
>So bring on the rain<br>Oh baby bring on the pain  
>And listen to the thunder<em>

Chloe King, you will always be my first love, my one true love, and my only love. That will always be the best summer of my life, your voice filled my thoughts, you truly are like any other, and not just because you're the uniter because you're you. And I have never met a more amazing person than you in my life and I really don't think I ever will. You will always be the first thing on my mind when it rains, you will always be my thunder Chloe, you will always be my love. So I'm ready to deal with this pain so that I can come back to you, so that I can help you with your pain, so that we can be with each other again. Because even if you don't feel the same way about me, we both need each other, even if we're just friends. I promise I will come back soon. I'll love you forever Chloe.

I will always love you,

_Alek Petrov_

**This is my first song fic ever so please review with your thoughts... I'm really not sure what I think of this... The song is Thunder by boys like girls**


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